Female Friendships

 I am currently in a very rural part of Madhesh, for a training program with a group of women. There are around twenty of them here.

And when I tell you that watching their friendships has been one of the most beautiful things, I am not even exaggerating.

There is something about watching women become comfortable with one another. The laughter comes easily. And I have found myself quietly observing all of this here, maybe because female friendships have always been such an important part of my own life.

I have always had female friends. Somehow, being friends with women has always come naturally to me. There is a certain kind of comfort I find in these friendships that I cannot always explain.

For a while, there was this very popular idea that female friendships were toxic. That women secretly compete with each other. That they cannot genuinely be happy for one another. 

But there is another side to female friendship that we don't talk about enough, the way women show up for one another.

The way a friend can sit beside you while you cry and not rush to fix you. The way another woman can understand exactly what you mean without you having to explain every little detail. The way we celebrate the smallest victories of our friends as if they were our own.

And as I sit here, watching these women interact with one another, I miss all of my girlfriends.

I have been fortunate enough to have some truly amazing women in my life. I love that I can talk to them about almost anything. I can go from talking about something completely stupid to discussing a controversial opinion, and then somehow end up talking about philosophy, relationships, life, society, feminism, career choices or why we are the way we are. And there is rarely that feeling of being judged.

I think there is also something very special about the way women care for one another in ordinary moments. Female friendships have given me some of the safest places I have ever known. And I don't think I will ever stop being grateful for that.

So yes, I love my female friends.

I love them for the chaos, the honesty, the gossip, the deep conversations, the ridiculous jokes, the disagreements, the hugs, the voice notes, the unsolicited advice and as simple as "Text me when you get home" messages.